


Longing for Home

by librarian_of_velaris



Category: The Folk of the Air - Holly Black
Genre: Angry Jude, Angst, Cardan shows up, Enemies to Lovers, Exile, F/M, Jude is in the Mortal World, Jude plots and plans, POV Alternating, POV Cardan Greenbriar, POV Jude Duarte, Revenge, angsty cardan, eventually, lots and lots of angst, post twk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2019-10-21 23:41:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17651918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/librarian_of_velaris/pseuds/librarian_of_velaris
Summary: Jude is exiled from Faerie, forced to live in the mortal world. There, she must adapt to a new life, and also plot her revenge against the King who betrayed her. Meanwhile, Cardan reflects on the events that forced his hand. A multi-chapter Jurdan fic with angst galore.





	1. Prologue

It’s been three months since Cardan exiled Jude.

Three months of what feels like endless, eternal time in the mortal world, and Jude’s getting bored. She spends her days in bed. Or the couch. Or, sometimes, if she’s feeling restless, at her local Target, or Costco, or whatever store provides her enough space to walk around mindlessly, biding her time until sleep will overtake her once again.

Most days, she doesn’t get out of bed.

She longs for the world of Faerie, her home in Elfhame, the dramatics and dangers Faerie presented to her. Every day was a new challenge.

Here, though, things are easy.  _Life_ is easy. There is no stringing rowan berries around your neck, sewing them into your clothes, or avoiding certain rivers and forests. She doesn’t have to put salt on her food before eating it or turn her clothes inside out to avoid getting lost. Living is simply moving about the world, spending money, and going through the motions. Jude hates it.

In Elfhame, she had to survive. Living was  _work,_ a day-to-day struggle, and she was happy to overcome it. Each day she woke up was another day she lived, against all odds, in the dangers of the world. Every rowan berry, every deal, every trick up her sleeve was something she was proud of, because it meant she was beating the odds. She was  _living_  in a world meant to destroy her.

And her success, her role of seneschal, and now Queen, is proof. That she, a simple mortal, can beat the best of them. Jude earned that right by living in Faerie and not just surviving, but thriving despite the odds against her.

Yet she is exiled, forced to live out her days in the world she was meant for. Granted, Jude knows the mortal world never has and never will be her home. The threads of destiny brought her to Faerie, where she truly belonged.

Where she ruled as Queen.

At least, she did, before Cardan exiled her.

Jude still doesn’t understand his betrayal. He cared for her, wanted her to rule beside him. He  _trusted_ her, and since he couldn’t lie, she knew he was sincere. And so she ended their bargain and married him. Truly, she was a fool for trusting a Faerie. She hated herself for being so vulnerable, for allowing herself to trust a being whose very existence was based upon trickery.

Oh, how she hates him now, the faerie who kissed her and married her and then sent her away. Cardan left her to rot. To become the filthy mortal he’d always thought her to be.

Except, he didn’t. He’d kissed her until her lips were swollen, fought for her freedom from the Undersea…she wasn’t just dirt, dust, and bones to him.

And yet…he’d exiled her.

Jude still doesn't understand. But she knows she is angry, and knows she will get her revenge on Cardan. Eventually.

She will exact revenge. She will be the Queen of Faerie. And she will go home. She just…needs to figure out how.


	2. Chapter 2

_I miss her._

Three months ago, Cardan exiled Jude to the human world, forced to stay until the crown pardoned her. What choice did he have? She’d killed his brother.

Granted, with Balekin’s death, it was more of a good-riddance situation—Cardan didn’t exactly care that he was dead. It wasn’t as though Balekin had loved him, anyway. He still remembered the whippings, the abuse.

But…he hadn’t wanted to pardon Jude. After all, he’d just gotten her back, made her his queen. They’d established a certain level of  _trust._

And he broke it.

Again, what choice did he have? Keep Jude, and anger the Queen of the Undersea, risking her wrath? He couldn’t take that chance. He needed to keep his folk protected. A year ago, maybe he wouldn’t have cared, but…Cardan found he quite enjoyed being king, and felt a certain level of loyalty to his people. He couldn’t put them at risk, not for a human.

If anyone had asked him, though, he would have said he was willing to do it. At the end of the day, as much as he hated to admit it, he loved Jude—cared for her—and it would be a lie to claim he wasn’t willing to risk the Queen’s wrath. He hoped no one questioned his decision, asked what he  _wanted_ to do. Because he couldn’t lie, couldn’t hide that he would have done anything to protect Jude.

Sending her away, really, was a part of that. She’d killed Balekin, duel or not. He was important to the Queen, and if she’d stayed…Cardan would have been forced to kill her. Or hand her to the Undersea. It wouldn’t have mattered whether or not she was his Queen. Blood demanded blood.

So humiliating her, sending her away…he could live with that, if it meant she remained alive. Protected.  _Safe._

Or, as safe as she could be.

There was still a chance that the Undersea would come after her, but with Nicasia stuck in Elfhame and Cardan’s still-growing power, he doubted she’d take the risk. But still, there was a chance, and so he positioned soldiers around Vivi’s house, where Jude lived. Cardan gave them strict instructions to remain out of sight and protect her (and her family, of course, Cardan wasn’t as cruel as many assumed him to be).

Jude didn’t know about this protection. She’d likely kill them all if she knew they’d come from Cardan’s personal guard.  

He would do everything in his power to keep her alive. And eventually, she’d come home. He was sure of that. He knew how  _she_ could bring herself home. Hell, she could step into Elfhame tomorrow, if she knew how. But he wasn’t simply going to tell her the answer. No, he knew she was clever enough to figure it out herself.

Cardan hated not telling her, but he couldn’t risk being the one to pardon her, or being the one associated with his pardon. If it was found out that he’d helped her come home, his loyalty would be in question. He could imagine what his people would say:  _you’re allied with…a_ human _? You made her your queen? You aren’t worthy of the crown._ She  _isn’t worthy of the crown._

His reign would be at risk. His life would be at risk.

Hers would be, too. And though he was willing to die for Jude, he wasn’t willing to risk her death.

So his plan…well, it wasn’t ideal, but it protected them both. When she came home, they’d deal with the rest. After all, no one really believed she was his Queen. Cardan, cleverly, avoided the subject when asked, though given everyone thought she was lying, Jude’s status as Queen became more and more of a joke. He hated seeing his Queen mocked, but he remained quiet, unwilling to risk revealing the truth—that he had made a human the Queen of Elfhame.

Again, they’d deal with that. Eventually.

After she came home. After she inevitably revealed her status to the folk.

Until then, Cardan could only bide his time, drudging through day to day life and his kingly duties. It all felt wrong without having her by his side. But he didn’t have a choice.

***

Cardan was sick of meetings.

Every day was damage control, it seemed. Between juggling Madoc and Locke, to keeping Nicasia content, he was ready for a break.

_Now would be the perfect time to visit Jude,_  he realized.

But he couldn’t. Risking a visit would mean risking being found out. It seemed that all eyes were on him, these past few months. Particularly Nicasia’s, who he found sitting on his bed as he stepped into his room.

“Hello, Cardan.”

“Nicasia. I had hoped to take a rest between meetings, but it seems that’s out of the question.”

“I’m happy to help you rest while I’m here,” Nicasia crooned, “you know how—”

“Why are you here, Nicasia,” Cardan sighed.

“Who’s to say I’m not here for some  _rest_?”

“You know I have no intention of that with you. Not anymore.”

Nicasia narrowed her eyes. “Interesting. Very interesting. It seems Jude has quite the hold on you, nowadays. How is she, anyway? Have you heard anything from our Queen of Mirth?”

“You know I haven’t. Is that why you’re here?”

She only smiled.

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

“My mother—the  _Queen_  of the Undersea—wants to know where Jude is. Do you know, Cardan?”

He met Nicasia’s glare. “The Mortal World.”

“We all know that. But  _where._ ”

“I don’t know.”

True. Though those protecting Jude knew where to find her, he made sure they didn’t tell him. Just in case something like this happened.

“You must know.”

“As I said,” Cardan sighed, “she’s in the Mortal World.”

“And that’s all you know.”

“That’s all I know,” he repeated.

“You’re a pathetic King, you know that, Cardan?”

Cardan rolled his shoulders and let his power—a King’s power—spring to life from where it laid dormant inside him. Light beamed in the room, trees grew closer to the windows, wind swirled around him. “The land doesn’t seem to think so. Now, I suggest you leave,” he said, commanding the wind to push Nicasia up off the bed and out of his room, shutting and locking the door behind her.

“You’ll regret this!” Nicasia yelled, pounding on the door, “when my mother finds Jude—and she will— _I promise that I, Nicasia, Princess of the Undersea, will make sure she suffers._ ”

He didn’t dare reply. But when he was sure she had gone, he let out a roar that shook the earth, his magic feral as it tore through the room, breaking the windows and doors.

_I need to find Jude._


	3. Chapter 3

Jude dreamt of tearing Cardan to pieces.

Every night she’d face him, sword against sword, and every night she’d wake up the winner of their duel.

If only that could be her reality.

Instead, she was stuck—away from home, forced to live in this hellhole they call the Mortal World. She might have been born here, but this was in no way her home. Cardan knew what he was doing when he exiled her. He knew exactly what a punishment this would be.

And punishment it was.

If living with Vivi and Oak wasn’t torture enough—she loved them, but family could be…exhausting, to say the least, what with Oak constantly running about and Vivi forcing her to go out, or worse,  _talk_ —she also didn’t have access to her poisons. Or her swords, her armor. Her  _clothes._ She’d left without them, and Vivi sure wasn’t going out of her way to get them for her.

_You can live like a human, Jude,_ she’d told her when Jude asked for her sword,  _you were born one, so now you can see what it’s like to live like one!_

Jude had thought that was particularly cruel. But of course, Vivi didn’t realize how much the words stung. Vivi loved the Mortal World! This was her home, not Faerie, where she was truly from. Jude thought that she might, at least, understand how she was feeling. Jude loved and belonged to Faerie as much as Vivi loved and belonged to the Mortal World.

But Vivi didn’t understand. Neither did Oak, who begged her to take him shopping, or to cook him dinner, or to read him a book before bed. He even asked for help with his homework, once, with disastrous consequences. She hadn’t the slightest clue about the history of this world, so when Oak asked her about presidents, she simply replied,  _what are presidents?_ Oak huffed and ran off to find Vivi.

Jude was utterly and completely alone here. And though she promised herself she wouldn’t miss Elfhame, or the dangers and rituals that came with living there…she did.

She even missed Cardan. At least he was someone to fight against, to beat.

_I will become so much worse,_ she’d once promised. Where was she now? Stuck on the couch, watching reruns of Project Runway with a bowl of over-salted popcorn at her side. She was nothing. Not anymore. Not worse, not better, just…nothing.

But every night, she dreamed of Cardan. Of her revenge. Oh, she would challenge him to a duel. And she would  _win._  So she kept going, watching tv, eating popcorn, living through each day in hopes that the next would bring her home.

***

“There’s no point in ruminating, Jude. Let’s go out, go shopping,  _something._ ”

Jude sighed, turning her head to face her sister. She had no interest in shopping. No desire to explore the human world.

Exploring the space from her bed to the couch was enough.

“I’ve already told you. I don’t want to go.”

“But  _Juuuuude,_ ” Vivi whined, “please? You haven’t been out in days.”

“And I’m perfectly happy with that. I’ve got my food, my couch, my…popcorn. I’m happy.”

“I wouldn’t call that happy. C’mon—” Vivi grabbed her sister’s hand and tried to pry her from the couch. “I need a new dress. Oak needs new shoes. It’ll be a family outing!”

Jude didn’t budge.

“You guys go. I’ll be fine, I promise.”

Vivi kept pulling. “You used to love the mall.”

She looked up at her sister. “And I used to live in Elfhame. Things change.”

“I’ll buy you a coffee if you come with?”

“You’d do that anyway.”

“Please, Jude. Oak wants you to come with. If you won’t do it for me, do it for him. He hates seeing you like this. Please?”

Sighing, Jude lifted herself from the couch. “We’re in and out. Dress, shoes,  _home._ Right?”

“Right!” Vivi squealed, “now go put on some real clothes—not those sweatpants, you’ve been wearing them for a few days already—and grab Oak. Be ready in ten.”

Jude saluted her sister and went to get Oak.

***

“You could’ve at least brushed your hair,” Vivi said as they strode into the mall.

Jude shrugged. “It wasn’t on the list. I forgot.”

“Sure you did.”

“You know me. Always forgetful.”

“You’re not forgetful, Jude! You never forget. Like how you talk every night about Cardan—”

“ _Don’t you speak of him_.” Jude’s eyes went wide. Oak took a step back.

“Jude?” Vivi asked, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Are you okay?”

She shook her head. “I’m fine. I just…don’t want to talk about him. Or hear his name. Okay?”

Oak and Vivi nodded. “Okay. No talk of the wicked king. Got it. Now, let’s look for some new shoes, okay, Oak?”

Oak smiled brightly and led them to a nearby store. In the window sat a classic pair of chucks: stark white, with red stitching. Though, interestingly, the soles seemed to be made of an opaque rubber. As soon as he tried them on, Jude realized why.

With every step, they lit up in shades of blue and red.

“These! I want these!” Oak cried as soon as he tried them on—and then refused to take them off.

Vivi grinned. “Converse with a twist. I like it. You’re sure you want these, Oak, and not some other pair?”

“Yes yes I’m sure! I don’t ever want to take them off! Ever!”

Even Jude, despite herself, chuckled. “We’ll take them.”

Oak left the store smiling in his new shoes, each hand held by one of his sisters.

“I wonder how long the batteries last in them,” Vivi mused as they rounded a corner. The store she was looking for was on the other side of the mall—why they didn’t go there first and make their way back, Jude didn’t know. But whatever. She went with it. This wasn’t her trip, anyway.

Oak’s little eyes went wide. “Batteries? Are those like magic?”

“Sort of, but with electricity.”

“Elec-tricity?”

Jude smiled, ruffling her brother’s hair. “Don’t worry about it.”

After at least ten minutes of walking—and Oak’s stomping to light up his shoes—they made it to Vivi’s store.

“Okay, I saw the dress online and they said it was in stock at the store. Look for it with me? It’s got yellow polka-dots.”

“That’s oddly specific,” Jude muttered, but tore away from her siblings to go and search.

She made it not five feet when she realized two things.

One—the yellow polka-dot dress was right in front of her.

Two—so was Cardan.


	4. Chapter 4

In hindsight, Cardan thought this was a good plan—a  _great_ one, really.

Finding Jude was easy enough. All he had to do was send another Faerie to protect her—it didn’t require lying, after all. In his eyes, the more Jude was protected, the better. After that, he simply had to follow close behind, being sure not to lose him—or be seen.

Being stealthy…that was harder. He’d never had the ability to be quiet, so to speak. Cardan was more of a grand entrance kind of Faerie. Usually with a goblet of wine in hand. There was no need for stealth, for quiet. Truly, it was a miracle he hadn’t been caught following the Faerie already. Between snapping branches as he walked through the woods and muttering varying curses as he was whacked by a branch, he’d half expected to be back at the castle right now, back at square one.

Instead, the Fae didn’t seem to hear him. He simply kept moving forward, unaware that he was being followed by the very King who sent him on this journey.

Maybe he needed to fire this Fae. Truly, he should’ve noticed someone like Cardan was following him. If this was what counted for protection…he wasn’t good enough for Jude. None of them were.

Which was why Cardan needed to ensure her safety.

_Isn’t that why you’re following him, anyway?_ He thought to himself as he crept through the forest.  _Yes. Because I need to make sure she’s safe. Obviously. Not because—_

_WHACK!_

Without realizing it, Cardan had walked right into a tree. Not a branch. The actual  _tree_ itself. Hopefully he wouldn’t be noticed.

Grumbling, Cardan stepped around the tree, keeping a wide berth so as not to run into it again. He needed to get moving. Already he could barely see the Fae in front of him. In fact,  _could_ he see him? Last he checked, he was at least fifteen paces in front of Cardan, but now…Cardan couldn’t see him at all. It was as though he’d simply disappeared. Vanished out of sight.

_Lovely._ Cardan rubbed his head, frustrated and in pain from where skin met bark. Was it really necessary to follow someone? Why couldn’t he have simply demanded they take him to Jude. That, truly, would have been much easier.

But Cardan knew. Three months ago, he’d given them specific instructions to  _not_ tell him Jude’s whereabouts, no matter his protests. He told them to let him fire them before divulging that secret. Jude needed to stay safe.

And it’d worked. Better than he’d expected. After all, when Nicasia came asking after Jude, he hadn’t been able to tell her where to find her. He truly didn’t know.

That didn’t help him now, though. Before he left, he’d asked and asked where to find Jude, even threatening one of the Fae in charge of protecting her—actually, it was the Fae he was following.

Or had been following.

The Fae protested. He was bound by Cardan’s word not to tell him.

_I don’t care what I said before!_ Cardan roared.  _Tell. Me._

_I cannot, my King. I cannot disobey you._

Cardan had seethed at that.  _You will tell me._

_I will not, sir._

_Then you will GET OUT OF MY HOME._

The Fae had left, clearly shaken, and Cardan was left, yet again, frustrated.

But he’d known he didn’t tell the Fae  _not_ to go to Jude. And since he was bound by Cardan’s word to protect her…it was easy enough to put two and two together and follow him.

Which is how he ended up here. Lost, tired, and aching.

He’d never even been to the Mortal World before. How was he supposed to find it now, with no guide to help him? Or, to show him the way. Hell, he wasn’t even sure how far he was from Elfhame. He’d lost track of time long ago, focusing all of his energy on being as quiet as could be and making sure not to lose this Fae.

So, Cardan kept moving forward, hoping that somehow, somewhere, he’d see the end of Faerie and the beginnings of the Mortal World.

***

Cardan wanted to turn back home.

Day turned to night, and still, there was no sign of the Mortal World. He’d kept moving forward, occasionally moving a little to the left or right, just to see if that’d help, but he was as lost as a mortal would be in these woods. Maybe if his family had taken him hunting, or even to the Mortal World, as they did with his brothers and sisters, he wouldn’t have gotten lost.

It was too late to turn back now, though. He needed to find Jude. And if he could just get to the Mortal World…he’d worry about the rest later.

So he set up camp—opting to sleep under a willow tree that offered some sort of protection—and went to sleep, hoping the next day brought him to Jude.

_Cardan dreamt of Jude. Of watching her fight, dueling with her enemies. He smiled at his Queen. She was beautiful. Utterly stunning. With every opponent, she brought them to their knees, slaying them with ease only a Fae could have. But she was human. And yet, she had bested each and every one of her opponents. Cardan was proud._

_And then she pointed her sword at him. Extended a finger, beckoning him to come forward. A sword fell into his hand. He stepped onto the battlefield, strewn with so many of Jude’s victories._

_“Let’s begin,” she said, her voice smooth as silk._

_“I do not want to fight you, Jude.”_

_“_ I  _want to fight you,” she replied, and thrusted her sword at him._

_He deflected the first blow, raising his sword just in time. Metal clanged against metal._

_“I do not want to fight,” Cardan said again._

_Jude ignored him, pressing her sword against his with all her strength until Cardan couldn’t help but be knocked to the ground. His instincts roared at him to_ use  _his sword, to_ fight,  _but he refused. He would not fight Jude. He would not hurt her._

_“I am not going to fight you,” he said._

_She was on top of him now, sword pressed against his. Cardan let go of his sword, letting Jude’s now rest against his throat._

_“I will kill you,” she told him, a gruesome smile on her face._

_And then she slit his throat._

***

Cardan awoke with a start, sweat beading on his brow.

_Just a dream. Not real,_ he told himself. But he knew better than that.  

Dreams were never just anything. The mortals might believe that nonsense, but for the Fae, dreams held meaning. And for someone as close to him as Jude, slitting his throat in his dream…he had a feeling that mirrored Jude’s own dreams as of late. And her desires.

But no matter. She might be in danger, and he was already on his way to the Mortal World. It was too late to turn back now. So he put his chin up and continued on his journey.

Still, he couldn’t shake the knot in his stomach. He’d suspected Jude was angry with him, but to want to  _kill_ him? He hadn’t expected that.

At least, not until this morning.

***

Cardan had reached a dead end. After walking for a few hours, he finally came upon the edge of Faerie. But between there and what looked like another island—the Mortal World, he presumed—there was a lake. One that he wasn’t stupid enough to swim across.

He wasn’t willing to risk the wrath of the nixies. Not when he wasn’t sure who they were aligned with.

How to get across? Well, he certainly couldn’t fly—

Or could he?

Years ago, he remembered Vivi telling him a story of one of her outings to the Mortal Realm. She’d created creatures out of moss and the earth to ride in order to get there, creating them with wings so they could fly.

And now, with Cardan’s affinity for the land, he supposed he could do the same. So, he searched and searched for enough moss and asked the land to create the creature Vivi had once described for him.

The land hesitated, as if knowing he was not to go to the Mortal World, but he encouraged it—pushed it to create. Eventually, he had a moss stag of his own to ride over the lake. He made sure after hopping on that he was well out of reach of the lake, just in case the nixies got any ideas.

After a short ride, he was on the other side of the lake. In the Mortal World. In front of him stood a grand structure, a giant square with what looked like multiple floors. Around that were various colored… _things_  with wheels, all sitting on top of a dark surface that seemed to be a smoother form of cobblestone.

Cardan kept moving forward. The Mortal World couldn’t be  _that_ big. He’d be able to find Jude in no time. Maybe the structure in front of him could help.

The closer he got, the bigger everything seemed. The things with wheels were large enough to hold a person or two, and as he looked into the windows, he noticed there were, in fact, seats. Whatever this was, he’d have to ask Jude.

He even saw a few moving, making a noise as he crossed their path. Whatever they were trying to say, he hadn’t a clue. So he kept moving, until he found the big glass doors that led into the giant structure.

Inside was like nothing he’d ever seen before. Merchants crowded every inch of space—there were multiple floors with hundreds of shoppes. Whatever this place was, he wished he had time to explore. Maybe he would one day. Surely, the merchants would love some Faerie money. But he was on a mission and wouldn’t let himself get distracted.

So he strolled into the first shoppe he came across, which sold fine clothes and wares. One particular outfit caught his attention—a yellow polka-dotted dress that he thought would look stunning on Jude. He was about to pick it off the shelf, admiring its make and fabric, when his hand brushed that of a fellow shopper.

Jude.

She was  _here._

“Ju—Jude.”

Her gaze was cold. Hard. “Cardan.”

“Are you safe?”

Jude didn’t reply. Instead, she turned around and walked further into the store.

“Jude, please.”

Again, she didn’t answer.

He called her name one more time, following her to the back of the store, but when he arrived, she was already gone.


	5. Chapter 5

Jude stared up at Cardan.

Of all the people she could run into here, he was the worst. The  _absolute worst._ And he wasn’t supposed to be here! He was the King. He should be in Elfhame, protecting his people.

So should she, but certain circumstances made that impossible at the moment.

How did he  _find_ her, anyway? It wasn’t as though she’d told him where she was going. In fact, she did everything in her power to hide her location from him, whether that be through Vivi’s own magic or Jude’s knowledge of Faerie protections. No matter. She’d deal with that later.

Hiding her panic as best she could, Jude hardened her expression looked directly at him. She would not be afraid. She would not yield to his power. He may have exiled her, but Cardan was in unfamiliar territory. She had the upper hand.

Still, that didn’t stop her heart from beating faster, or the anxiety that threatened to seize her at any moment.

“Cardan.”

Her voice remained steady. Though she hadn’t quite mastered her panic inwardly, at least she could hide it fairly well. She kept her body still. Stoic.

He asked her a question, though Jude could barely hear it over the ringing in her ears. She didn’t want to look at him any longer, didn’t want to stare at the one who betrayed her after manipulating her into trusting him.

And so she turned around and strode to the back of the store, where she knew she could find Vivi. Cardan called after her, but she would not turn around. He deserved this. He deserved her cold, icy stare, her stiff body, her anger. He  _hurt_ her. She would not give him the time of day, King or not.

His actions were unforgiveable.

She found Vivi looking at a rack of sweaters. “We need to go. Now.” Jude whispered, tugging on her sister’s hand. Oak stood behind her, tapping his shoes together.

“Jude, I haven’t even found what I’m looking for! I know you don’t like to shop, but—”

“Cardan is here.”

Vivi’s expression darkened. “We’re leaving. Oak, take my hand. You too, Jude.”

They both did as she asked. She guided them into the dressing rooms, where she muttered a few words. Wind stirred around them, the clothes on the nearby hanger swaying with the breeze. A tug pulled Jude and her siblings from the dressing room until she could see blue sky, clouds…and the ground. That they happened to be hurtling towards.

“Hang on!” Vivi cried, before starting to mutter yet another incantation. As they fell to the ground, through cloud after cloud, Jude prepared to be splattered on the grassy field below. She would die, and it wouldn’t be because of Faerie. It would be because of Cardan. She hated that. Hated that Cardan was the reason she was in this situation, the reason she was about to die—

Jude stopped falling.

Had she hit the ground, her body splattering into pieces, and this was death? If so, she hadn’t  _felt_ hitting the ground, so at least she was given a painless death.

But then she looked around and spotted her sister, Vivi, and her brother, Oak. They were right next to her, sitting on…a cloud? Jude looked down. There, all that kept her from falling to her death was a cloud.

“What in the…”

“I did it!” Vivi shouted, elated. “I saved us! I wasn’t sure if it was going to work, I mean, I haven’t tried this before, but it  _worked._ We’re alive!”

Oak repeated after her. “We’re aliveeee!!!”

“We’re alive,” Jude said dryly.

Vivi ignored her. “This’ll take us right on home. It’s better than a car!”

“What about  _our_ car?” Oak asked.

“We’ll get it tomorrow,” Jude said, dreading another trip back to the mall.

Vivi nodded. “No more malls for today, Oak. I think we’ve had enough fun. And once we get home,” Vivi said, lowering her voice so only Jude could her, “you’ll tell me everything that happened. Right?”

“Right.”

***

Vivi put Oak to sleep as soon as they got home, much to his protests.

“But I want to watch TV!”

“You can watch as much as you want to tomorrow, I promise. For now, bed.”

“Can you at least tell me a story?” Oak’s eyes were wide, his expression sad. Jude knew this look. This was his puppy-dog look. She’d know, because she taught it to him as a kid, promising him that he could get what he wanted if he gave anyone that expression.

_What about using magic?_ He’d asked, and Jude had simply replied,  _sometimes magic won’t work. Like on your mom. Or Vivi._ He frowned and then had asked her,  _what about you?_ At that, Jude gave him a conspiratorial grin.  _It won’t work on me, or Taryn. But the puppy-dog eyes? They’ll work on everyone._

Jude regretted teaching him that trick, now.

“I don’t know any stories,” Vivi said, exasperated. “How about you just head upstairs and—”

“I’ll tell you a story,” Jude said. At that, Oak smiled broadly. “Go put on your pajamas and I’ll be right up.”

“Puppy-dog eyes always work!” Like a triumphant king, Oak climbed the stairs to his bedroom.

“I wish I’d never taught him that,” Jude muttered.

“Taught him what?”

“That expression,” Jude sighed, “I told him he could get what he wanted with that. Turns out, he took my advice. He’s too cute to  _not_ read a story to.”

“So  _you’re_ the one who taught him that! He’s been pulling that shit with me for  _months._  You’re right, he’s hard to resist. He’s a cute kid.”

“I know.”

“But anyway, let’s talk about Cardan. What happened earlier?”

Jude tensed. “Can we talk about this later? After Oak’s asleep?” She didn’t want him overhearing. He didn’t need to know the specifics of what happened with Cardan. Or that he showed up today. Luckily, he’d been distracted earlier and didn’t hear Jude’s reason for their departure. Ideally, she’d like to keep it that way. The less he knew about the cruelty of kings, the better. After all, one day he was going to be the one to take up the throne.

“Jude…it’s important,” Vivi whispered, so low Jude could barely hear it.

She took her sister’s hands. “I’ll tell you. I swear it. Just…let me put Oak to bed first.”

Vivi sighed. “Fine. But after, you tell me everything.”

***

“What story are you telling?” Oak asked as Jude tucked him into bed.

“That depends. What would you like to hear?”

“Ummmmmm….” He thought for a moment. “How about a story of a princess?”

Jude raised a brow. “Any princess?”

“One who becomes a Queen!”

Jude thought for a moment. She could certainly tell that tale.

“Once,” she began, “there was a beautiful Faerie girl. She came from a poor family; her mother and father had trouble providing for her and her sister. But she was the most beautiful girl in all of Faerie, and one day, a lord came to her home. He saw the girl, saw her beauty—but also saw the ragged clothes she wore, the tattered furniture of her home, the poor state of her sister.

“His eyes narrowed on her mother and father. ‘How could you!’ he bellowed, ‘your daughters are sickly, they are neglected, they are filthy. No parent should treat their child like this.’ And so the lord killed the mother and father for their treatment of the children. His sword cut through them both, and the girls could do nothing but watch in horror as they saw their parents, who had taken such good care of them and loved them very much, were murdered before their eyes. The lord took them away to his home, where they grew up to be princesses.

“As the years went by, one of the girls began to forget the cruelty of the lord, his murderous nature, and embraced him as father. The other girl, though, never forgot, and vowed her revenge—on him and the world that stole her from her home. Once she was old enough, she decided she would become Queen. She would best them. And so she caught the eye of the Faerie prince, whom she hated with her whole heart. But for herself, for her revenge, she would marry him.

“And marry him she did. She became Queen—everything she’d worked for, every cunning maneuver, it’d worked. But the new King knew of her plans, and he was still cruel. So one day, he exiled her and forced her away from her kingdom—”

“This isn’t a happy story!” Oak interrupted, frowning.

“Hold on,” Jude said, smiling, “let me get to the end.”

Oak looked at her expectantly.

“Our exiled Queen never forgot that the King was responsible for her exile. Every day, she plotted to take back the throne, to find a way to go home and take her place as the rightful king. So she concocted a plan: she would dispose of the King and take his place, for she would no longer be exiled if the King was around. She snuck into his castle in the middle of the night and, making sure no one was around, stabbed him in his heart. He awoke with a start and pulled out the knife, but it was too late. He was dying.

“He looked up at the Queen. She stared down at him, a grim smile on her face before leaving. She’d gotten her revenge. The next day, after they found him, the Queen was summoned to the castle and informed of her husband’s death, and then asked if she could now rule. She nodded grimly.

“From that day forward, the Queen ruled over Faerie, a just and kind ruler. But she never did forget the King, who’d hurt her so. She never forgot the cruelty she’d faced and vowed never to let it return to Faerie.”

Oak was dozing by the end of her story. Jude was grateful; she hadn’t wanted to answer any of his questions about the story—where it came from, was it true, or others. He was an inquisitive child, and she hadn’t wanted to tell him that yes, it was true, and that she’d come up with it herself.

Gently closing the door, she climbed down the stairs and back to Vivi, who was watching tv on the couch. As soon as she saw Jude, she turned it off.

“Okay, so Cardan.”

“Cardan,” Jude repeated.

Vivi nodded. “What happened at the mall?”

“I don’t know how, but while I was looking for your dress, I turned towards a dress that looked just like the one you were looking for. I took a closer look, and when I looked up, there he was. His expression was…pained, maybe even grateful? I just don’t—”

“How did he even get here? He’s never been to the mortal world before, and I’ve never told him the specifics of how we did it, back when we were living in…” Vivi trailed off.

“I don’t know, and I don’t care. He  _can’t_ be here. He needs to leave. If he doesn’t, I’ll take matters into my own hands. It’s not as though he’s under Faerie’s protection here.”

“You can’t just kill him, Jude.”

“That would solve  _all_ my problems, though.”

“And then Elfhame would find out, and you’d definitely be killed.”

Jude shrugged. “I can protect myself.”

“Jude,” Vivi sighed, “you’re not killing Cardan. Not now.”

“It would be  _so easy_ —”

“Stop it, Jude. Stop. You said he seemed worried when he saw you?”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“You two had an alliance. He  _married_ you. Maybe…maybe he didn’t send you away to humiliate you.”

Jude stared at her sister. “That’s impossible.”

“It’s not, though. Maybe you should try talking to him? It might help you, you know, with…everything going on right now.”

“I have nothing to say to him.”

“Sure you do, Jude. You talk in your sleep. I know you dream of him. Surely, you’re thinking about him, too.”  

“Only about his head on a platter,” Jude replied.

“I don’t like saying this, Jude, but maybe you need to give him a chance. Maybe he can get you back to Faerie?”

“I’m not talking to him, Vivi. I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

With that, Jude pounded up the stairs, into her room, and slammed the door shut.

No, she would not talk to Cardan.

Not now. Not ever.


	6. Chapter 6

There was no point looking for Jude anymore.

He’d searched the store at least three times now, roaming the aisles and checking underneath racks of clothes, but no luck. Jude was nowhere to be found.

How could she have just…disappeared? It’s not as though she had magic on her own, and she couldn’t have just walked right past him.  _Could she?_ Cardan shook his head.

He still wasn’t sure why Jude hadn’t said a word to him. After all, he only came here to make sure she was safe! He put his  _life_ on the line to find her. He roamed the forest and found his own way to the Mortal World to get to her. To keep her protected from the Undersea. But as he stood in the center of the store, staring again at the polka-dotted dress, he wondered if by coming her he’d only put her in more danger.

No matter. She was gone now, and he hadn’t a clue where. Or how.

Maybe it was better this way. Maybe finding her wasn’t what he needed to keep her protected. If he’d just trusted his guard to protect her…

No.

He couldn’t rely on his guard. Not when the threat of the Undersea remained. Couldn’t Jude see that he was trying to protect her? Her exile was for  _her._ Nicasia would help plan her murder, if she’d remained. And Cardan wouldn’t have been able to do anything to stop it.

At least this way, no one could find her.

Even Cardan himself.

But he wouldn’t stop searching. He would find Jude and he would speak with her. He would keep her safe. He just…he needed make sure that she heard him out.

***

Cardan wandered the giant structure until he found the glass doors he’d come through. It took him longer than he’d want to admit. After all, the structure had so many shoppes. He figured it wouldn’t hurt to stop in to a few, and then another few, and then…it was dusk, and he was being shoved out the door, and he had bags upon bags on his arms.

All of it—every bag—for Jude.

After exiling her, the least he could do was to get her a gift. Or ten. It wasn’t as though he’d gotten her a marriage gift, either. It might not have been ideal, but this would have to suffice.

Now, to find her.

He trudged back to the woods, past the mysterious machines and through the bright street lights until he managed to find a tree that offered enough shade and protection for the night. Unlike Faerie, where the trees sang and blossomed and thrived, the ones here were dull, morose. As though they hadn’t been given the attention they deserve, and dying off.

Cardan sent a pulse of his magic up the tree trunk, through the branches, and into the leaves and roots. It seemed to smile in response; warmth curled up its trunk and it leaned closer into Cardan, as if it craved more of his magic.  _Needed_  more.

Maybe this world needed the King of Elfhame to keep it safe. Maybe…this was a sign.

He shook his head. He had more important things to worry about than a tree or two. He needed to find his  _Queen,_ and there wasn’t any time to lose. The trees, the forest, they could be helped later. Jude could help him with that.

Racking his brain, Cardan thought of where Jude might be. He’d found her by happenstance at that shoppe, and it  _was_ possible that she’d need to go there again. So, he could wait there. Go back every day and see if she walked through the doors, but Jude was smart, and good at evading him. If she didn’t want him to find her (and he was fairly certain that was the case, though again, he didn’t quite understand why), then she would never come back to the shoppe. So that was out of the question.

He  _could_ use a tracking spell to find her, but he’d promised Jude to never use magic against her. Cardan was regretting that promise more and more, lately. And if she didn’t want to be found…maybe the spell wouldn’t have worked, anyway.

It seemed that his only option was to wander the Mortal World until he happened to find Jude once more.

Defeated and exhausted, Cardan waited for sleep to claim him, thinking of Jude all the while. Wishing—hoping—he would somehow find her.

***

In his dream, Cardan searched for Jude.

_Cardan wandered the world, searching every corner for his Queen._

_He’d had no luck. He checked every shoppe, every building, every forest, but she was nowhere to be found. It was as though she’d disappeared from existence itself—he hadn’t found a trace of her for months, years._

_He wiped sweat from his forehead, pushing his hair out of his eyes. His scraggly beard itched, he hadn’t had a shave—or a haircut—for as long as he could remember. He’d been too focused on his search, wanting to finally bring her home._

_So he wandered the Mortal World aimlessly, waiting to find any trace to pick up on._

_Months passed, his beard grew, his hair grew knotted, and then…and_ then.  _He scented Jude, the vibrancy of her soul, now dulled down to a mere whisper. It wasn’t what it once was, and he had to strain to catch it, but it was her. It_ had  _to be her._

_He followed the scent as best he could, letting it lead the way. It brought him to an area full of homes, right next to the forest. They were small, nothing like the grand homes of Elfhame, and made of dull, drab colors and wood. You could feel the lack of magic in this world, the lack of_ life.  _Yet, for them, this was home. No wonder once they saw Elfhame, they never wanted to go back home._

_Cardan made it as far as a street named Walden Lane before he lost the scent to the wind, replaced by an overwhelming fragrance he couldn’t quite place._

_But he wouldn’t give up. He had to be near. She must be in one of these homes, he realized, as a plan began to form. It wasn’t his best idea, but it would do._

_So he strode up to the first door on the street and knocked._

_No one came to the door, and so he went to the second, where an older couple said they’d never seen or heard of anyone named Jude. He went to the third, then the fourth, and so on, until he’d covered every home on the street save for one. Its lights were off, both on the inside and outside, so it seemed to sink into the shadows, as though hiding from the world. From the street itself._

_As if by magic._

_Cardan’s heart pounded._

_He ascended the steps, the shadows shielding him from view. He knocked on the door._

_Once._

_Twice._

_He was about to knock a third time, when the lock unlatched, and the door creaked open._

_And there was Jude, a scowl on her face, a dagger in her hand._

_“Jude, I—”_

_He hadn’t gotten a word out before her dagger reached his heart._

***

Cardan jolted awake, his heart pounding against his chest.

Dreams had always been vivid for him, but never so…real. Usually, he’d wake up and laugh off whatever nightmare or dream came his way; he knew what was real and what was not. But this one, he’d  _felt_ the dagger as Jude jammed it into his heart, he’d truly  _believed_ that he’d been searching for months, not days, and when he woke up, he thought he’d found Jude and he was dying.

He clutched his hand to his chest, expecting to pull back and see blood. But there was none. He felt his chin. No beard. His hair. Shorter than it had been in his dream.

It wasn’t real, hadn’t been real.

Cardan was still under the same tree he’d fallen asleep near. He’d heard legends of Fae having dreams like this, so vivid that they couldn’t tell reality from imagination. For those Fae, their dreams were prophetic. Somewhere, somehow, part of what they’d see while sleeping would come true. Or guide them on the path they were destined to travel. He thought these were mere legends to tell a boy before sleep, not that he would have one himself.

And yet, that house felt so  _real,_ her scent exactly as he remembered it, and the neighborhood…he remembered the colors of the houses, the shapes, the way the trees seemed to sag on the street.

He remembered Walden Lane, where he saw a house obscured in shadow.

Where, if his dreams were right, he’d find Jude, a dagger in her hand.

**Author's Note:**

> Jude and Cardan have such an interesting dynamic to me, and I'm excited to tackle this story from both of their POVs. Thanks for reading <3 <3


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